To the Top of Africa and Back!

I’m no mountaineer and definitely no camper! Traveler? For sure. Adventurer? Possibly – as long as I know that I can return to a place of comfort. I have now returned to my place of comfort – my home – and I’m glad to be back and able to reflect on my journey.

If I have to sum up the experience in one sentence it would be: This was an experience of extremes – the toughest thing I've ever done.

I both hated every minute and loved every minute at the same time. An experience that challenged me on every level - physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. The question of “why am I here?” came up every single day and yet...

The exhilaration, the beauty and the spirituality were beyond description. To push yourself beyond the point you imagine you can go and then to be rewarded with magnificence and pure beauty is indescribable. To absorb nature's art in its purest form is joy! My eyes filled with tears every day – sometimes from the sheer hardship and sometimes for no reason at all.

The final night was a period of being awake 36 hours and on our feet for 25 of those. I was frozen to the bone. I didn't think some of my fingers or toes would make it. I was exhausted, depleted and broken. Shuffling along step by step in a line up, I was constantly battling the grip of cold, tiredness, breathlessness. I constantly needed to be woken up by my buddy behind me as I sleepwalked some of the time. The thoughts in my head kept me going and its amazing to become aware of where your mind goes in times of hardship. There was a point that I didn't think I would make it – my breaking point – just before sunrise. I could not see how far I had come or how much further there was still to go. All I knew was that I had been walking for hours and I was done – my body would move no more. I could go no further. A few sips of tea from the guides, hand rubs, back rubs and strong words of “you can do it, Daphna” somehow gave me the inch of strength I needed to get up again and reach towards sunlight – our only measurement of the end.

The rays of the sun were like a healing energy, as a little warmth and energy started seeping through my body and thawing my frozen bones. Slowly slowly I trudged further along the path. I made it, first to Stella point – a milestone on the journey to the summit – and then to Uhuru Peak – the summit. Uhuru was a further hour of walking in the cold, thin air. The path seemed endless, every slow step getting us closer to the peak. At this stage some of us walked in pairs, arms entwined, partners in climb, supporting each other to the end. The feeling of reaching the summit was incredible – it was unbelievable to have reached our goal in such tough conditions. We hugged, cried, laughed and took plenty photos. We had arrived at our goal after 5.5 days of climbing – just one step at a time!

I feel blessed and privileged to have reached the summit because I was millimeters away from not making it. The reward was the magnificence of the place and closeness to G-d! The support of the team and our loved ones back home got us through. This is an experience that has been life changing for me – I had to dig so very deep to get there and I found the strength in the depth of my soul, in G-d’s guiding angels, in the support of the team and in the love of the people back home. 
 

At the end of a full night of walking, we still faced the walk down. Another 9 hours of downward climbing to the camp where we would spend the next night. Just as we reached the end of our strength, we knew we had much further to go! Reaching the summit was a giant achievement but coming down was still part of the journey too. Once again, we reached deep inside us to find the strength to continue and we did! Well done team Kili!

This is a Big Deal

Decision to preparation to action takes some giant leaps. This trip has been a part of my life and thoughts for 3 months now but nothing compares to the morning of. I wake up with an energy that is electric – I can barely sit still to write this blog. Together with that sits a knot in my stomach expressing the dread of what I’ve undertaken. I realise that this is actually a big deal. Yes, another crazy idea that I’m actually putting into practice!

I can’t actually believe that the day has arrived, that this is really happening. The logistics of the things that need to get taken care of before I leave are a mere distraction from my feelings that are overwhelming.

As I sit here and write, I am filled with love and emotion for the way this journey has taken hold and I’m touched with the outpouring of love and support that I’ve experienced. My eyes fill with tears at the messages that I receive from my friends wishing me well on this journey. The prayers, quotes and words are filled with love and that is ultimately what this journey is about.

As I say see you soon – lehitraot, tot siens – I’m carrying all that love and encouragement with me and I know that this is what will get me to the summit! On those cold, lonely, exhausting days and nights I will know that you are all with me rooting for me to go further – one step at a time! Onwards and upwards my friends…

The science and technology of Kili gear

 Jo Borkett, Mango, Truworths, Foschini and Forever New are my regular hangouts when the time comes to add some items to my wardrobe. High heels and power dressing is my regular delight. I’ve often been told that there’s “casual” and there’s “Daphna casual” which doesn’t quite make the casual cut. However, in the last few weeks, I’ve discovered a whole new world (and wardrobe). Shops I never knew existed, are now my regular haunts and I still fill with dread at the thought. The new list covers Drifters, Cape Union Mart and Columbia for serious camping gear! The new wardrobe is filing with fleeces, down and thermals and definitely NO COTTON!

There is a science to Kili clothing that has absolutely nothing to do with style, fit or colour. The latest concepts are comfort, warmth, waterproofing and wicking!

In the past, warmth was achieved through various layers that have to match and complement each other in style. Now, I’m asked to believe that 3 layers will keep me super-warm and as long as the size is right and there’s no cotton, forget style and colour!

So… how does it all work?

There are 3 layers to Kili clothing and these will keep you dry and warm if you do everything as per the instructions. The first is the thermal layer – top and bottom to keep the moisture off your body. The second layer is for warmth. Here come the fleeces. There are 100, 200 and 300 fleeces and the number has to do with the weight of the fleece per square meter. These come in 3 basic styles and 2 colours per style if you’re lucky! You can layer as many fleeces as you like to increase warmth. Finally comes the outer layer – a breathable plastic that hold the heat in, basically the weight of a rain coat.

That’s it! Of course you then add to your list boots, socks, gloves, buffs (never heard of these before), scarf and hat and you’re equipped! Nearly every item needs 2 layers and all this is really important for summit night so you land up spending on fortune on stuff you need for one night only!

My first visit to Drifters was completely overwhelming. I walked in, got the drill and walked out again without buying a thing. As the shop assistant was talking, my heart started beating faster, my breathing got shallower and I thought I was having a panic attack at the amount in need to spend on items I will probably never wear again… and seriously, the most commonly found colours are black and grey.

The second time, I sent my good friend with the instruction – buy 2 of everything! What you get for you, get for me too! This was great! I thought I wouldn’t have to go back. But, alas, I did. With the third trip, I was equipped with a list of what I still needed – the guys were great – and I made it in and out with everything I needed and still breathing!

The guys at Cape Union Mart and Columbia are great too! They greet me by name as I walk through the door and are always ready to help out. Thanks for making this whole new shopping world as painless as possible for me – and I certainly hope that the gear will keep me warm, dry and comfortable and that I won’t have to come back for a visit anytime soon!

Leaving everything I know behind…

With less than 2 weeks to go there are many things that I have to think about in preparation for my trip and there are many things I’m trying very hard not to think about. I’m sitting with emotions of apprehension, doubt and wondering “why am I doing this again?” together with emotions of excitement, enthusiasm and anticipation of “I just can’t wait to get there already.”

With every day that goes by, comes an increased appreciation of the simple pleasures of life, enhanced by the knowledge that I will not have these pleasures on Kili. On a regular day, the simple pleasure of ending a training session with a hot shower – allowing myself to rejuvenate in the flow of water – highlights the fact that after a long day of hiking, all I’ll get is a bowl of luke warm water to wash with and share with a friend. Ending a regular day by getting into a comfortable bed, electric blanket switched on and snuggling under the duvet, highlights the lack of these comforts at Kili. This creates a bit of a wobble inside me that begs the question – can I really go through with this?

But then… speaking to people who have summitted Kili and seeing their pictures from the top of Africa makes me want the experience all the more. I believe that when life’s comforts are stripped away, when the distractions (and necessities) of every day life are removed – you get to meet the person that you truly are – no diversions, no masks. When the going gets tough, our authentic selves shine through and when we let our authentic selves shine, we get to experience the true beauty of our soul.

This is why I’m going… and I’m looking forward to spending quality time in the company of myself – all distractions, aka comforts, stripped away!

In this high place
it is as simple as this,
leave everything you know behind.

Step toward the cold surface,
say the old prayer of rough love
and open both arms.

Those who come with empty hands
will stare into the lake astonished,
there, in the cold light
reflecting pure snow,

the true shape of your own face.  

~ David Whyte ~

The Cause

I’ve written quite a bit about my personal journey so far – the training, my thinking and my fears. I think it is now time to take a look at the raison d’etre for this journey.

As my holiday in Mauritius comes to an end, it is a good time for me to express my gratitude for an amazing holiday that came at exactly the right time. When I arrived, I was feeling exhausted and in desperate need for some me time. As I leave, I feel blessed and rejuvenated. The resort we stayed in catered to our every whim and we all felt absolutely spoilt every minute of the day. We barely had to glance to the side and a waiter would be there to ask if there was anything we needed.

Resort life feels like a self-contained world where you can almost begin to believe that this is what the island is about. We took one day to tour some of the towns in the Island and were struck by the stark reality of island life. While we were rejuvenating ourselves and relaxing at the resort, there are people living in absolute poverty, desperate for a way to make a living and relying on us tourists to provide them with a way to earn some income. The contrast was thought provoking.

We see this dichotomy everywhere in the world. I believe that it is up to every one of us to make sure that we are grateful for what we have and that we contribute to others that are less fortunate than ourselves wherever we can. That is why I’m proud of the fact that while the Kilimanjaro trip is a personal journey of meaning and growth, it is also about a cause that is larger than myself. This trip is about inspiring women in challenging circumstances to know that anything is possible, one step at a time. The charity that we’re supporting is the Women’s Empowerment Division of ORTJET and the aim is to establish an Academy that will provide training of marketable skills, teach financial management and ensure sustainable independence.

This is a dream to raise hope and restore dignity.

As we go on in our daily lives, hundreds of women across our communities battle a never-ending onslaught of hunger, anxiety and self-doubt. Their decisions involve making choices between providing a roof over their children’s heads, or food in their lunch boxes. They rely on hand-outs, food parcels and the generosity of strangers. The purpose of the Kilimanjaro campaign is not only to raise awareness of the needs of these divorced, widowed, abused and vulnerable women but more importantly to raise enough money to establish the Academy.

The charity that is creating this Academy is ORT SA. Their motto is "Educating for Life". Giving skills, tools and education to South Africans from all backgrounds, cultures and education levels, helping all ages to ensure gainful employment and moulding people into contributing members of society.

In the words of Tali Frankel, a fellow climber and friend, "If you believe as we do, that the best way to give to someone is to equip them not with a food parcel but with the ability to earn, not with a welfare cheque but with marketable skills, not with gratefulness but with dignity – then join us on our incredible journey."

If you would like to join me in championing this worthy cause, please add your donation on my back-a-buddy page on http://www.backabuddy.co.za/champion/project/the-kili-climbing-coach-daphna-horowitz or by contributing via EFT.

Thank you all for your support!

Banking details:

Johannesburg Women’s ORT

Standard Bank Norwood Mall

Branch code: 004105

Account number: 001824538

SWIFT code IBAN : SBZAZAJJ

Ref: DSH/Your Name

Slow and Steady

Ok… so I was all gung-ho, motivated and determined to create the extra hours in the day and the extra energy it took to make time for the ambitious training programme for Kili and I did very well until… I got sick!

It started with a simple cold and a few sniffles and I was still going strong. This will take a couple of days to clear and I’ll be back in training – can’t let anything hold me back at this stage – I told myself. And that’s exactly what I did… took 3 days off and was back in training quick as a flash until… I got sick!

As a quick aside here, I need to say that there was no easing in to the training for me. From the get go I was pushing myself to the limits – running that little bit faster, staying in core-building positions that little bit longer. In addition, there was no change to my already frenetic lifestyle – working till late at night (or the early hours of the morning) to make sure that everything was still getting the attention it needed. Everything except me of course! I was very proud of myself that I had actually created a couple of extra hours on training days and nothing needed to change. Aren’t we always saying we need a few extra hours in our days?

Well… then I got sick! This time it wasn’t a little sniffle that would take a couple of days to clear up. This time I was hit with a flu that every day I woke up feeling worse than the day before. For an A-type like me this is torture and all I do is continue to push through. After 5 days of this (and thankfully the arrival of the weekend and so no need to change any work commitments!) I finally succumbed – with no voice and a torturous sinus headache – I stayed in bed for 2 days. At this stage I thought, ok I’m getting to the worst of it and when Monday comes, I’ll be starting to get better. But alas, the sinus headaches continued and I finally admitted that I needed to go to the doctor. Armed with a host of medications (including antibiotics and cortisone sprays) that put paid to the training for yet another week.

At this point I started to reflect that maybe I needed to look at the bigger picture. Why did I get sick and for so long, battling to get back to feeling normal again? What is my body wanting to tell me?

After the usual denials and classic arguments that you get sick from bugs called viruses and bacteria and not for any other reason, the truth of the matter is that if your immune system is weakened enough, you’ll catch any bugs that are going around much more easily. And then comes the question that I didn’t really want to look at…

Why did I get to this point?

My critical learnings as I reflect on this time are (…and I am writing this blog as I sit on a lounger on the beach, taking a long awaited for holiday in Mauritius)

1.         Rest and relaxation

There are a critical number of hours of sleep and recovery that every person needs and I pushed myself beyond this point. Thinking that I had discovered 2 hours extra time per day without realising that it would need to eventually be made up somewhere was a critical mistake.

2.         Stretch but not stress

Even within the training programme, I stretched myself to the point of stress. It is important to stretch yourself to do more and achieve more but just like an elastic band, if you stretch it too much, it will break.  The balance between stretch and stress is a delicate one that needs to be maintained.

3.         Listen to your body

We all know how it feels good to have a great workout and feel that sense of achievement – especially for someone like me who is really not a sporty type. When embarking on a training programme, make sure to listen when your body says its enough. It takes time to build up the training and your body will tell you when its ok to stretch and when its time to take a break.

4.         There are no shortcuts

When you learn something new and want to build on it, it takes time and practice. There are no shortcuts. Just like you can’t take a pill to create more time in the day, you can’t build your strength overnight. Take the time to do it slowly, properly and in a way that will be lasting.

To use the words of a good friend of mine, “slow and steady wins the race”. As hard as it is for me to get my head around this concept – I delight in the fast pace, lots of projects to be involved in and keeping the string of achievements up – this is going to be my motto for Kilimanjaro.

There is no race here – there is a journey…

When the coach gets coached!

Have you ever had the experience of getting a taste of your own medicine? Where everything you do is just turned back on you in a way that makes you understand the irony of life and have a good laugh at yourself?

Well, recently I’ve had the joy of experiencing exactly that! And it’s happening on a daily basis from my Kili training coach. Admittedly, I find exercise difficult (see previous blog) and I have to say – yes, hard to admit but true – that I’m a bit of a complainer when it comes to doing it. I’m using all the resources and support I can to get myself going and even in the sessions, you’ll find me bargaining over the number of hill sprints, push ups and the like. I’m the first to puff and pant away saying “stop – I can’t do this anymore”, only to hear my coaches saying back to me, “of course you can! Come on Daphna, what kind of talk is that coming from a coach?”

I’m the one saying “I can’t do it, isn’t there an easier way?” This is a slightly embarrassing admission for a person who has dedicated her life’s work to helping others achieve their own ambitious, challenging goals! I’m the one encouraging my clients to move beyond their comfort zone, take a deep look at themselves and go for what they want – even when it challenges them on an emotional, mental and physical level. The irony of the situation has gained me not a few chuckles from my partners in climb. “What would you say to a client who tells you they can’t do it Daphna?” in a mocking, sarcastic tone – wink wink, nudge nudge!

But together with that, I am pushing myself beyond my comfort zone (way beyond!) and I am thankful for the reassurance and support from my trainers and friends – of course you can, look how well you’re doing, look how much you improved – and at the same time we all chuckle at the tables being turned.

So, yes… I can admit that I’m battling with this exercise thing. I have Robyn coming to fetch me in the morning just in case I decide to pull out at the last minute and stay snuggled in my warm bed – I came very close on a few occasions. I have Tshepo, Lucky, Thabo and Sipho – amazing training team – encouraging and motivating me to take that extra hill, extra lunge or push up and all the while chuckling at how they need to use my own words back at me to get me going! And I have amazing friends in my fellow climbers who inspire me to keep going by knowing they are facing the same challenges and plunging ahead!

For now, the support, encouragement and inspiration is working. And the experience is making me that much more empathetic to my clients when they struggle through the things they need to overcome to push their boundaries and achieve more. I have the same struggles as anyone else and I can see that having someone believe in you, challenge you and encourage you is exactly what is needed to get the goal done!